Dating red flags! How to tell if your crush isn’t interested in you. In today’s video we’re going to be discussing 10 dating and relationship red flags that suggest your crush doesn’t like you back.
If you’ve found yourself on today’s video you’ve probably got a certain someone in mind and you’re thinking some of the following: Does my crush like me, is my crush interested in me, how can I tell if my crush into me? Don’t worry, you’re not alone and it’s not an uncommon thing to find yourself worry about at times like this. That’s why we’ve put together these 10 red flags to watch out for.
Dating Red Flags – Does My Crush Like Me?
Have you been on a date with your crush, looked across the table and wondered, “is my crush into me? It seems like they are on their phone under the table”.
It can be hard to pick up on signs that someone isn’t interested in dating you. On a date, so many things could be going through your mind. It can be overwhelming! Plus you are finally on a date with your crush, you want it to go well.
Unfortunately, sometimes that person is not meant for you. If that’s the case then you deserve better and they deserve to be with someone they click with.
In this video, we are going to dive straight into 10 red flags that your crush isn’t into you.
Keep an eye out for these red flags on your next date. You’ll be able to use what you learn in this video on every future date you go on.
Poor Communication
Poor communication is the first sign that you’re crush doesn’t like you. Communication is key in any relationship or friendship. If you really care about someone, you will make an effort to get in touch or reply to their messages.
If you have found that your crush is all over the place when it comes to communication. It might be a red flag that they are not into you.
There is nothing worse than sending a message to your crush. Only to not receive a reply all day. You sit near your phone and every time a notification comes through, your heart drops. But it is not them. You feel used and hurt.
On a date, they don’t talk to you and there are large periods of silence. When you try to phone them, they don’t answer. Or they may even have ghosted you. Ghosting is when a crush just disappears without a word. These are all signs that they are not into you.
You are better to move on in this situation. They are most likely only going to cause you heartbreak down the line.
Walk away and keep your head held high.
They seem distracted
You have managed to pin your crush down but they seem distracted. They are busy looking out the window or fiddling with the salt and pepper shakers on the table. Anything to not look directly at you.
They could also be constantly distracted by work, other friends and family.
If your crush seems distracted then they are not making you a priority.
They don’t laugh at your jokes
You don’t have to be a comedian to be funny. Everyone has their own quirky sense of humour and your crush will laugh at your jokes if they are into you. If you find that you are littering some of your best material into a conversation and not getting any laughs from your crush. You might be asking yourself is my crush into me? Well, the truth is, if they don’t take the time to laugh at your jokes, it’s a major red flag.
Life coach, Stacy Caprio says “When someone is into you, they’ll be smiling just being around you, and if you try to be funny, they’ll appreciate it and it’ll be easy for them to laugh. If they don’t really care about you, they won’t bother to smile or laugh.”
Putting barriers in place
When you like someone, you lower your barriers. You become more flexible with your time or with things you would like to do. This is a sure sign that it’s going well.
When someone isn’t into you, they will put barriers in place. Dr Jack Schafer from Psychology today said “people who like each other remove obstacles between them”. This is often a subconscious thing that a crush does when they don’t like the other person. This could be something like putting a handbag, newspaper, magazine or a cushion in between them. It could also be not being as open and honest with the other person as they could be.
Next time you are on a date, take a look at the other person’s body language. Are they putting barriers in between you both?
The future
A crush that isn’t into you will avoid talking about the future at all costs (they will even avoid the immediate future). This could be talking about the distant future but also immediate plans. They will try and avoid making plans with you. Instead, they will say things like “maybe we could do that at some point” or “I’ll need to look at my calendar”. These are tactical ways of avoiding the questions that you are asking.
According to Celia Schweyer, a dating and relationship family expert, “It’s either they sound hesitant or dodge the topic completely when making critical plans for the future. This red flag is also applicable to smaller plans you could be making. They will seem unexcited with the idea of having trips with your family or going on a vacation together,”
This is them not investing themselves into you and is a major red flag.
It’s just not obvious
If you even have to think, is my crush into me? Chances are they probably are not. Sometimes it’s not that obvious that they like you. They are not showing the normal signs. Like smiling, laughing, touching your arm or staring into your eyes. The University of Dayton did a study on this in 2018 and proved that if someone likes you, they will show you.
Instead, your crush is avoiding eye contact and on a date looks bored. They have not introduced you to their friends but you have been seeing them for months. These are all bad signs. Sometimes we read into things too much and at the end of the day, it’s simple. It’s just not meant to be.
They keep their life private
Whether it’s a first date or a fifth date. Life is often a topic of conversation. You might discuss where you live, what your job is and hobbies you have. When your crush is not into you, they won’t talk about their private lives. They might ask you about yours but they will keep theirs to themselves. If you ask them, they will change the topic.
This is because talking about things that happen in your life is personal. If you like the person, you are willing to share these personal details but if not, you keep them to yourself.
You are the only one to make plans
A sign someone you are dating isn’t into you is that they will never make plans with you. In the beginning, you might just think that they are shy. But this is most likely not the case.
It doesn’t really matter to them if they see you or not. So they will not put in any more effort than necessary. If you start to notice that you are always the one making plans, it’s a sign that it’s time to move on.
You deserve someone who is really going to commit to you because you are amazing!
They booty call you
You’re just drifting off to sleep and you suddenly see a message pop up on your phone. It reads “you up?” and it’s your crush. You get a rush of adrenaline and say yes sure. Even though you were just about to visit your dream land. This happens every Saturday night. They turn up after being out with friends and leave first thing in the morning. It’s the biggest red flag of all.
They interrupt you and don’t listen
If you are talking and your crush interrupts you often, this is rude. After they speak if it looks like they are not listening and have switched off, it means they are only interested in hearing their own voice. Not only is this someone you don’t really want to be with, but it also shows they are don’t care about how you feel.
If this happens to you, politely say you have to leave and find the nearest exit.
Honestly, you deserve someone who gives you their full attention and is interested in who you are. So go out into the world and find your person!