In the animal kingdom is it natural for the male to initiate any form of mating. Most animals don’t tend to ‘date,’ only humans have adopted this sense of family and cohabiting – and the female will choose to accept or deny the mating between the two. Without words they have gotten it down to a T when it comes to this cycle of natural reproduction. So why can it be so difficult for humans?
As humans, it is fair to say we 100% over complicate a lot of things in life. Sometimes for enjoyment and sometimes because it’s just something we have been raised to do or believe, and we have never questioned it. One of the oldest sayings that we all know is “Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” which basically says that men find it extremely hard to understand and relate to women in a lot of ways.
We are not as simple as the lioness roaming the plains in Africa who just wants to mate to have cubs. No, we want a family, we want love, and we want to build a home with our partner to live in until we die.
Part of the whole ‘we don’t understand women’ mindset is trying to understand if they have feelings for you or not. Because women don’t really like to come right out and tell you how they feel out of fear of rejection.
So how do you find out if a woman likes you? Simple…body language.
Your arms are essentially the guards stood outside the building protecting those inside – in this case it would be your heart (and other vital organs but we’re talking about feelings aren’t we). So, if you’re standing, or sitting, talking to a lady and her arms are relaxed by her side, or even in her lap then this is a good sign. The guards are off duty, and she feels comfortable around you, and the topic of conversation isn’t threatening to her.
She could be fiddling with her fingers in her lap but that would be because she is a little nervous. Nerves are good as it shows she is interested in you and even has some feelings for you. Win win for you sir!
Now, the opposite of this would be if the guards are on full patrol. Whether you are standing or sitting, if her arms are crossed over her chest then she is not happy at all. She is subconsciously protecting her heart (and other organs) from you or the topic of conversation you are having.
She may feel threatened or wary of what is happening in the moment, but this is not a good sign. It may not be you but the environment that you’re in that has her on edge, but if you bare this in mind then it could be the make or break of your situation.
If you notice her arms are crossed, take a small step back so that you are not invading her special space and ask if she is ok. It could be a case of “it’s too loud in here” to which you can go somewhere quieter that will help her relax.
Eyes are the window to the soul and even when you don’t say anything, your eyes will do the talking for you.
When you are engaged in a conversation with someone and you’re looking them in the eye, you’re subconsciously telling them that they have your undivided attention and you’re 100% listening to what they have to say. Is she making eye contact with you when you’re conversing? If she is then that’s very good, she’s listening and you’re also intriguing her and building her interest.
Alternatively, if you’re talking to her and you notice her eyes are looking anywhere but yours, then this is a clear sign for a few things:
- She’s not listening to you – maybe there’s something on her mind
- She doesn’t feel safe enough to make eye contact – could be she is shy or that she does not feel comfortable with you
- She is looking around the room – this could be the fact that she’s not enjoying the conversation or you, so she is looking for exits. Or she’s looking at others around to see if she can drop her guard and feel safe
Making eye contact not only lets the other person know your subconscious intentions and feelings towards them, but it also shows your level of confidence within yourself. Confident people don’t look at the ground to see their next step, they look ahead because that’s their destination.
Noticing the knees is remarkably similar to the arms we’ve previously talked about. This one is for when you’re sat down, of course. When you’re conversing with a woman and her knees are pointing towards you, much like eye contact, this is her body communicating to you that you have her undivided attention, and she feels comfortable with you.
Her body will naturally gravitate towards you if she likes you, her subconscious feels safe and has let the guard down so her knees will face towards you making it easier for her to scoot closer as the conversation goes on.
On the opposite side of that, if her knees are facing outwards away from you, she is not as comfortable as you may think. Having her knees like this makes it easier for her to stand up and walk away at any given moment without any obstacles. Her subconscious is on high alert waiting for something to pop up so it can say “no girl, let’s get out of here” and she can walk away.
When a girl likes you, she will find any excuse to touch you and feel that skin-on-skin contact that we, as humans, naturally crave.
She could brush her hand past your leg if you are sitting beside each other. Or she could place her hand on your arm whilst laughing at something you’ve said to indicate that the space between the two of you can get smaller as she likes you and feels safe around you.
She will find any excuse to touch you to show you that she likes you and if you notice it, it is a massive green flag for you!
Now of course, the complete opposite if this would be if she holds her hands closer to her own body and offers little to no touching on her behalf. This is a clear indication that she doesn’t want to invade your personal space, nor you hers.
There are many reasons why women would act like this, so let’s not jump straight into the “she doesn’t like me let’s move on” mindset that some guys have. Take the time to get to know her a little more and you might discover some things you need to know. This could be because she doesn’t have feelings for you, she doesn’t want to cross over from friends to more, or she just doesn’t feel comfortable enough around you to overstep that boundary.
Body language is especially important when it comes to communicating with anybody throughout your life, especially new people as you begin to discover things about them from the get-go.
Understanding and knowing the signals to look out for can be very beneficial for you when entering into the dating world and discovering the things women won’t come right out and say.
Don’t get me wrong, there are some women who will just straight up tell you what they want you to know, which helps massively when it comes to overstepping boundaries and being on different pages. But there are some less confident, more shy women who will let their body language do the talking for them.
Next time you are at the bar, and you notice a woman giving you eye contact – green flag of course – why not go up to her and start a conversation.
Having these signals under your belt will help you determine what she is thinking and will make the whole getting a date process a lot easier for the both of you.
You don’t have to second guess yourself, and she doesn’t have to stress about you not getting the hints she’s dropping.
We wish you all the luck in the world entering into this new dating chapter, may the odds be in your favor!