Learn how to respond to rejection from a girl. Dealing with rejection sucks, but it’s still an experience we can use to learn and grow from, provided we deal with it and approach the issue in a sensible way. In life, rejection when it comes to dating, is bound to happen at some point.
It’s not the be all & end all, and honestly that feeling of rejection will only last a small amount of time, it’s much better than an extended period of regret. If you follow today’s 11 tips you can turn getting rejected by a girl into a moment of learning & reflection.
The full transcript of this video is available below.
How To Respond To Rejection
Rejection hurts, especially if it happens when you thought you were going on to something special. And I get it, it’s so hard to not take it personally or to even feel slightly insulted.
Sometimes you don’t have to respond to rejection but in some situations you should because it can work out in your favor. Because who knows, someone could come back around to you or even set you up with their friends when they see how sweet and humble you were when you dealt with the rejection.
So stay tuned to find out how to respond to rejection messages. My name is Anna welcome to the video
1. Don’t respond at all
Pretty easy, sometimes you don’t actually have to say anything. If you were rejected over text message and you guys haven’t really spent much time together, then you really are not obliged to reply. The other person probably isn’t expecting you to reply anyway so just don’t force it.
If you feel really hurt about the rejection you can just simply delete the message, block the person and move on and heal.
Otherwise, replying opens up that communication line and they may keep replying back to you and obviously, if the woman was pretty rude to you with how she actually rejected you, she doesn’t even deserve a reply.
2. Thank her for her time
This is a really sweet and humble way of replying. You literally just say okay I understand and I thank you for your time and the time that we spent together. And thanking her is you being honest and telling her that you still appreciate her and that she is a lovely person and you wish her all the best.
It’s a polite message that lets her remember you as a nice kind person because like I said at the start, you never know if you guys will cross paths again down the line.
Plus you never know how small the world is. What if her friend swipes you on a social media app only to be told that well he handled the rejection like a complete jerk don’t go on a date with him?
3. Ask them why they rejected you
Let’s get a little bit juicy, you can ask them why they even rejected you. Now did you know you could also do this when you were turned down for a job role. A lot of people don’t do it, you are allowed to ask someone what you were lacking with. It doesn’t always guarantee that you will get an honest and clear answer, but if you are humble when you ask, hopefully she can be honest.
It could just be a bit of advice that you need to adopt which will help you to find a better relationship. Now you will always learn something about yourself from a relationship no matter if it was a short term or a long term thing.
Remember that sometimes you could be rejected because you are too nice, the lady realized that she’s not ready to date or she needs to work on herself or an ex got back in touch. Just because you are rejected isn’t a projection that you are in the wrong.
4. Do not get angry
I see it so many times. A guy gets turned down by a lady and his response is to be spiteful. Call her names and get angry and just be very rude. It’s awkward, it’s cringy and very immature. Just because she turned you down doesn’t mean that she’s a bad person.
Things just didn’t work out for whatever reason. Don’t make her out to be evil or a bad person and please do not lash out with the rude comments to make her feel the hurt that you are feeling. It just will always backfire.
5. Remain calm and very collected
If you can, I always advise for you to take out the emotional attachment. It makes the whole situation a lot easier to deal with and stops you making a fool out of yourself if you do get too upset or angry. You don’t have to respond straight away, just accept the outcome, exhale let go of the pain but remain great for the experience and then you can reply.
6. Cut off all contact
Okay let’s talk about cutting off all contact. You don’t need to instantly block them on social media as I kind of feel blocking is a little immature. You simply just remove them from social media and you refuse to entertain any form of communication with them. This means you save yourself a ton of heartache in case they do pop up on your newsfeed with a new partner and it stops you thinking “what if she was the one that got away”. And if the girl gets back in touch down the road, depending on the reasons that she rejects you of course, will depict if you should entertain her again. However, if you both mutually feel the same, that you know maybe we are just better off as friends then you can stay friends on social media. But it depends on how you both feel and how much emotional investment there was. You don’t always have to say let’s be friends, if it’s going to hurt you, keeping her in your life, then cut her off and just focus on your healing.
7. Don’t take it personally
This is hard to do but try to not take it personally. Of course, easier said than done, but you are allowed to feel low for a while after the rejection. But that doesn’t mean that you have to keep dragging it out for many many months.
8. Reflect on what you did
If you can, use this opportunity for growth. Think about how you could have done things a lot differently. Did you ignore some red flags or did you grow in the process, did you realize rejection was a good thing?
Maybe you are successful on getting dates but none of them make it to date two, so obviously do a little bit of thinking and realize what’s going wrong.
9. Do not beg
If someone gives you the rejection message it means that they have put a lot of thought in it before they did so. So please respect this decision and do not beg her for another chance. And if you do feel hurt by the rejection that’s okay and I get it you want to have a second chance, you want to fight for it.
But first you need to act like you are not distraught. Respect her decision and then say “I don’t agree with it” or walk away anyway. If she feels she wants to work it out and she sees that maybe she does really like you, when she does come back it increases the chance of her getting back with you. Because begging just turns people off.
10. Be prepared for rejection
It happened to the best of us. In times when we never expected it to happen it’s going to happen. So always be prepared and when you understand that even the nicest person has once been rejected, well at least once or twice, it makes the situation a lot less painful.
Accept that sometimes you were not a good fit for someone for reasons unknown, but that doesn’t mean that you are any less of an amazing person.
11. Do not make a thing of it on social media
This is so common and I’m talking from an own experience that I saw with my old little eyes. A guy who was a friend of a friend was rejected by a girl after a couple of dates. And then he uploaded an image of him and her onto instagram with the caption “she is lovely but we decided to be friends”.
Now if you don’t feel the second hand embarrassment like I did then you need to ask yourself if this is actually acceptable healthy behavior. It’s awkward and very controlling and lets the world know that this guy had an attachment trauma that he needs to deal with.
Now a very common thing you will see is people will instantly change their Facebook profile status and then slander that person in the comments. And yeh, I get it you are hurting but that doesn’t mean you have to air out your dirty laundry.
One last bit!
You always learn a lot about yourself and your own problems and things that you can offer in a relationship just from having a small little relationship with someone. So if they do reject you please try to think of ways that maybe you can prevent this from happening again.
As we get to the end of a relationship we start to think about the start of the relationship. And that’s when things pop up into our head and we think “hang on a second, this person said that they were this and that but then when I met them in real life they weren’t”.
So this lets you actually have a better radar of qualifying people to make sure that you are dating people that are of high value and someone that ticks many of the boxes that you have on your list of what a partner needs to have and what they are doing to grow.