Should you or shouldn’t you get back with your ex? That’s a question I’m sure many of us have faced in our lives. Is it worth giving them another try? Will things be different? It’s tricky isn’t it.
Today we’re going to be taking a look at 9 reasons why you shouldn’t get back with your ex. Have a read through and think about your current situation and how each of these applies to what you’re experiencing right now.
1. Ask yourself why?
When considering getting back together with an ex, take a moment to think about yourself. Ask yourself why would you want to put yourself through that unhealthy relationship again?
You can get along with someone extremely well outside of a relationship setting, but when you jump back into “being together” you’re likely to experience all the same problems that the relationship had before.
2. Are you the co-dependent type?
Did being with them actually bring you happiness, or do you find that you just have a need for companionship? Some people find that they have such a need for companionship that they’ll take an unhappy relationship over being single. Learning how to be happy on your own is vital, it will give you the time to find the person who is perfect for you rather than settling for anything less.
3. Time passing doesn’t mean things have changed
As time passes it’s easier to hold onto all the best parts of the relationship whilst forgetting about everything that made it suck. This is why so many couples go through the same cycle over and over again breaking up, getting back together then breaking up and repeat.
What can be done about this? Try writing down all the negative aspects of the relationship that you really didn’t like, whenever you’re thinking about getting back together with them, look over what you’ve written down and ask yourself, has or will any of this have changed?
4. You’re wasting your time
Time really is one of your most limited assets in life, you don’t want to be wasting it repeating the same mistakes. Take the time to think back about all the decisions you’ve made that you wish you could have changed so you could get back that wasted time. Ask yourself, do I really want to be committing even more time to this? You need to focus your life on moving forever instead of repeating mistakes from your past.
5. Like they say “there’s plenty more fish in the sea”
This could in fact be a massive opportunity in your life for you to get out there and really start living. Losing them isn’t the end of your life, you have other needs and desires that you should focus on for a while. When you’re finally ready for dating again, you’ll find there’s plenty of potential partners out there also looking for the one.
6. The odds are stacked against you
Think about it, how many people do you know who have gone through this cycle of breaking up and getting back together again, really ended up in a happy and long lasting relationship? Whereas when you think about how many have tried and failed, it’s likely you’ll find that that’s far more common. Do you really want to keep ending up back where you started over and over again?
7. They don’t think you’re good enough for them
If someone doesn’t think you’re good enough for them, there’s not much you can actually do to change that perspective they have of you. They may say you can change this or that, but even if you do change those things, they’ll just come up with new issues.
If they had a history of putting you down, especially in public and in-front of their friends, you really need to consider if that’s something you should be putting yourself through again. Realise you’re better than that and deserve to be treated better too.
8. You’ve already made it through the hardest parts
The process of a breakup can be extremely hard and painful, but you’re still standing, you survived the process and done the hard bits. Do you really want to be going through all of that again? You need to have a very good reason to go back to an ex, you’re potentially committing a lot of time and lost opportunity to go through the same relationship, you want to make sure it isn’t wasted.
9. You broke up for a reason
No matter who ended the relationship, it did end for a reason. The reasoning for a breakup doesn’t suddenly vanish just because you’ve broken up. If and when you get back together, they’re still going to be there waiting for you, ready to cause trouble all over again.
If things haven’t changed, you have no sensible reason to expect the end results to be any different. You should think about taking steps forward with your life instead of taking steps back again.
Did you find today’s article helpful? If you have anything you’d like to share please comment below.