When it comes to traits women find attractive and what turns women on, who would have thought we’d end up discussing emotional vulnerability?
It’s understandable many men initially see this as weak behaviour that women wouldn’t like, but that’s really not the case.
With emotional vulnerability, comes a lot of very attractive traits that women want in a guy. From better trust, better communication and even higher levels of confidence!
Today we’ll be taking a look at these traits that stem from emotional vulnerability and discuss why it is, women find these traits so attractive and desirable.
The full transcript of this video is available below.
Emotionally vulnerable traits that woman find attractive
Okay, so I know what you’re thinking, being vulnerable to a lady and letting them know that you have some emotional weakness probably makes you feel like you are less of a man right?
It probably makes you feel like you aren’t being attractive. Let’s face it, every woman is very emotional and they are emotional beings. So surely opening up about a weakness makes them feel like, “oh I don’t want to date you”.
It’s actually a very attractive trait for many different reasons. Specifically, because ladies know that you are genuine with your feelings.
That you are emotionally healthy and according to Dr Brown vulnerability is taking that emotional risk. In saying something without actually knowing what the outcome could be.
It’s basically you showing up as your most authentic self. With the lasting thought of maybe she would turn around and say she doesn’t actually love me. Or maybe she doesn’t want to go on a date with me. Obviously, you opening up first gives you a lot of confidence and makes you more attractive.
So stick around for the rest of the video, my name is Anna.
You can express your emotions clearly
Now this is very attractive because someone that is emotionally healthy with their own availability is able to recognize how they feel and they can manage their own emotions. Which means if you are dating someone who has this trait, you are less likely to struggle to understand what they want, how they feel and what their needs actually are.
It makes the relationship boundaries a lot smoother and it means that person is able to understand what you need. Making the relationship overall a lot better because isn’t it better to be with someone who can explain themselves, long term, than it is to date someone that just cries and doesn’t really know what’s going on in their own head.
Spending the rest of your life with them it’s attractive because it gives you the ability to grow if someone is emotionally healthy. It means the other person is able to accept what isn’t working for them in the moment this means you can fully acknowledge the process completely.
It means you can grow in your self development
No one is exactly the same as the person they were when they were a teenager and if a lady sees that you can be just a little bit emotionally vulnerable at the start of a relationship, she is able to understand that you can grow as a person.
This means you can keep up with life stresses and she doesn’t have to worry about looking after you.
The overall communication is better
A woman completely values communication. She understands her female friends and how she can connect with them based on this emotional support.
She knows how they feel, they know how she feels and it’s just a great feeling process. If you are able to open up about your own vulnerabilities. You are a lot better in terms of the communication process.
You will tell her when you don’t feel good about the relationship. When you are not happy with something all in the hope that there is a resolution and a chance to fix something. She knows that you are able to express when you are happy. This means you guys are less likely to have ridiculous heated arguments. This is because both couples are just a lot better at communication.
It means they can speak up about what they want. They can listen and they want to find a solution pretty quickly.
There is a deeper level of empathy
Vulnerability is attractive because it lets the other person know that they have a deeper level of empathy.
They care and understanding which means they are not willing to push aside. That fear of rejection to just be our true valuable self.
We know it’s not an easy skill to talk about the thing. A lot of people don’t do good things for the fear of rejection.
However if someone is skilled in doing just that and putting themselves out there, it means women are able to appreciate that.
They understand the struggle because the vulnerability is apparent in females.
The trust is stronger
Naturally someone that is able to offer their vulnerability is also someone that values trust in a relationship.
These people will trust each other in a relationship meaning the intimacy builds much quicker in the overall relationship.
It’s genuinely a very healthy relationship, you are not bothered about society’s opinion of you.
You don’t let society dictate how you feel
Let’s address the elephant in the room because society tells you to wipe your tears. If you are crying it’s a sign of weakness.
Apparently, it’s a sign of weakness if a guy has emotions. This is completely ridiculous because if guys weren’t supposed to feel emotions, evolution would have taken them away.
If a woman can say that a guy is able, to be honest, and talk about his emotions and open up with his vulnerability. She knows he isn’t someone that’s a slave to the social hierarchy.
It means he is much more willing to break through what society tells him to do in order to just be his true self. Which is incredibly attractive! A guy that is able to say, this is how I’m feeling. This is what I’m doing today. It means they are vulnerable.
They don’t know how people are going to react to it and it’s really ballsy and very attractive.
The beauty behind being vulnerable is it’s still painful for a woman to admit her feelings as well.
So when a guy admits his feelings, she just feels a lot more like “wow he just goes against every grain of society written things on the wall and he’s just incredibly awesome”.
As ladies, we know how much strength is needed to open up about your feelings. We completely understand how much you feel when you do put yourself out there.
To feel slightly uncomfortable we get it we acknowledge it, we feel it and we appreciate it.
You can enjoy the moment
The most valuable thing about being in a relationship is being able to open up and love someone every day.
The bittersweetness here is that hidden thought in the back of your mind. That your person could stop loving you for some reason. They could just go out one day and find someone else. This doesn’t stop people from wanting to be in relationships.
It means they are putting themselves out there on that vulnerability line. For the chance of actually being exposed and not being loved back. However, when you accept this is a genuine outcome of every single relationship. You think, “you know what I’m not scared of it”.
If it happens, it happens, I’m happy right now. It means you are able to really feel good in the moment. Experience some amazing experiences with your partner. For those that have a fear of intimacy. They are normally very avoidant in their relationships. They struggle to build vulnerability with other people.
Therefore they always hold back because they dread being abandoned. Hurt is always at the top of their mind. Meaning it gets in the way of every relationship. They shut down and women are very quick to notice this in a guy.
However, if a guy is being very vulnerable towards the side of a relationship she thinks ” he’s emotionally healthy I’ll date him”.
You are a great father figure
As women we think about every single long-term situation, no matter what it is.
What we’re doing could be work, it could be owned in a car or it could be our potential partners. It’s naturally ingrained into us. If we can value someone’s current state of emotions, we can see what they would be like when they grow as a person.
If they are able to talk about their feelings, it shows they have a connection with other people’s feelings. Specifically with children.
Remember children haven’t quite understood their vulnerability. When a guy is really good with children we’re like, “oh well gotta date him now”.
A child gets upset and they cry. They might not always know why they are feeling sad because they haven’t built that intelligence yet. That’s where the mothers and fathers come in because they train the children to say I’m upset for this reason.
For example, the guy might say are you sad because you’re hungry? Are you sad because you broke your toy?
Now being able to teach someone else these types of skills when it comes to emotions is very very attractive.
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Have an amazing day, see you soon.