It can be scary trying to approach a woman and try to pick her up. Most men do feel this way and experience a lot of fear at one time or another. Even the ones who make it look very easy.
Now there is no way of completely getting rid of the fear sadly. But there are tips and tricks that makes it easier to pick up a lady. So if you practice, over time, it will get easier, less scary and you won’t be fearful.
I’m going to teach you some tips and tricks on how to pick up women without any fear and let me tell you some of them might just surprise you.
How to pick up girls
Hang out in high traffic areas
The first hurdle is finding a woman to pick up and having her find you! Try hanging out in high traffic areas so that you have the best chance of spotting a lady.
If you are in a bar, this would be around the bar area.
Or you could try places like a park, coffee shop or even a shopping mall.
Obviously, you don’t want to just be waiting and looking at every woman that walks in. This will make you look super creepy and desperate.
It might be easier to be with a group of friends so that you look more casual. If your friends start talking to her friends, it comes across as a more natural exchange rather than planned.
Laugh with your friends
Girls are attracted to funny guys and if they see a guy laughing, it often grabs her attention.
Laughing with your friends is a great way to grab a girl’s attention and then invite her into the conversation.
She might be looking at you and laughing as well, you can then say something like, “why don’t you join us?.” It’s a great way to start the process of picking her up, plus, she already knows that you are friendly and funny.
Walk towards them
It might not be possible to laugh with your friends or hang out in high traffic areas. So, another way to pick up a girl is to walk towards her and then initiate a conversation.
Picture a girl standing by a table in a restaurant. Walk towards her, look at her and smile and then say, can I buy you a drink? This is a smooth opening line, and it grabbed her attention. You can both then have a drink and get to know each other.
If you did not want to go for the, can I buy you a drink line, you could try, how are you? Or are you having a nice day? These can be slightly softer opening lines.
Look into her eyes
Connection can start by simply looking a girl in the eyes. She might not have noticed you, but once you lock eyes, you have her attention.
Straight away she will probably start acting differently to try and grab your attention again.
You could make her sweat a little before approaching her.
Once you have approached her, listen to everything she has to say and look her in the eyes while she speaks. This will make her feel like you are really interested in her and that you are not just there to pick her up.
Take a compliment and make a compliment
If a girl pays you a compliment, don’t brush it off. She really means it and you look more confident if you say thank you and accept it.
It’s important that you give her a compliment back though. Make sure it is something that you really think and feel.
It should not be something random that just pops into your head, girls can tell when compliments are not genuine.
You could compliment her looks, personality or what she is wearing.
This will help her really see that you are interested in her and flirting with her so that she knows this connection is going somewhere.
When men are picking up women, they often give up too quickly and turn negative.
They might talk to her for 2 seconds and if she is a little shy, think she is not interested and walk away. That’s it, all done and now you need to find another woman to pick up!
It’s important to stay positive both in your own mind and in the language you use when speaking to her.
Even if it seems like she is not really sure about you, keep using positive language. Obviously if she is not interested at all, then leave her and move on.
Take a seat
It’s not just you that should be putting in all the effort. She should be as well. So, take a seat and see what happens. She will probably walk over and ask if she can sit next to you.
Or she might just look at you from across the room before approaching you on the dance floor.
Either way, show her how confident you are and let her do some of the work.
If she approaches you, it shows you that she really wants you to pick her up and this should help get rid of most of the fear.
Girls love confident guys.
Don’t beat around the bush and keep her guessing. Be direct and tell her how you feel.
You could say that you have really enjoyed talking to her today and leave it at that. Alternatively, you could say something about how amazing you think she is and that you have not met a woman like her before.
You want to show her that you are trying to pick her up without saying, I am trying to pick you up. Being as direct as possible helps you do this, and it shows her that you are confident enough to be like this.
Don’t forget to call her before day 3
You met her, you had a lovely conversation, everything went well, and you got her number! Now you need to make sure that you call her.
This is often when men get the most nervous because they have no idea what to say. Often, they will put it off until it is too late and then when they do call her, she never replies.
You need to call her or message her before day 3. This way you are still fresh in her mind.
I think calling the morning after you meet a girl is the best. That way you do not have time to make it scary in your head and she will remember what a great time she had with you!
Leave her a nice message
No one really likes leaving a message, but chances are, she won’t answer. So, you need to pluck up the courage to leave her a nice message.
Try saying something like, it was lovely to meet you last night, did you have an enjoyable time? It is much easier to type a message to her and leave it that way.
Often writing down words is easier than having to say them out loud on the spot. If you can, message her, and if you can’t leave her a nice simple message.
Celebrate her success
Once she gets back in touch, you will probably just be talking or messaging for a while before you move on to dating.
It is important that you do not lose her at this point especially after all the hard work you put in to picking her up.
One way men lose girls at this stage is by not celebrating their success. If she mentions something great that has happened in her day, celebrate it!
Tell her how happy you are for her, don’t start talking about all the great things that have happened in your day.
Confident, successful men do not need to show off, remember that!
Ask her on a date
The final step and the things that everything has been leading up to. Asking her out on a date!
She has messaged you back and you have maybe had a few exchanges. Now you can ask her if she wants to meet up with you and go on a date.
Chances are, if you have been talking, she has been waiting for you to do this. Once she says yes, this signifies that you are moving on from pick-up to dating!
You have successfully tackled picking up a woman without fear, well done!